1. You really find out who your true friends are. People that I once thought would always be there for me, I haven't heard a word from. And although I don't expect all the attention on me a simple "Hi, I'm thinking about you and praying for you" would be awesome, because God knows (literally) that I tried to always be there for them during their struggles. However, in their absence people that I once thought I was mere acquaintances with have turned into my biggest supports and always seem to have an encouraging word to say.
2. There will always be at least one person who can your personal journey and struggle all about them. I don't think this needs any further explanation.
3. People who can have their own children do not get criticized or judged for the things they do, people who choose to not have kids can do whatever they want without people thinking twice, HOWEVER if you can't have your won kids and have declared that one day you will adopt, suddenly everyone is your financial adviser and every penny you spend someone has something say about it. So because my uterus is all sorts of whacked out and my husband and I will have be parents in a different way, we shouldn't be allowed to have any sorts of fun while we are in waiting. As if somehow all the blood work, all the prescriptions, all the tests, all the spent money, all the preparing and all the heartache does not entitle us to some destressing - people really amaze me. Somehow this makes no sense to me??!!??
3. There are people who really aren't a part of your life who think they have a say in how we choose to live our lives and the things we do. This is really really comical - in all honesty their thoughts on me and Justin's decisions have no effect and I wonder what thought came into their mind that they believe they have a right to make an opinion. (I know everyone is entitled to their opinion but not about my life)
4. I am as emotional as a pregnant woman. I have never cried so much before in my life. Everything makes me a little sad, or maybe a little happy -sometimes I don't know - but I do know that my tear ducts work for sure!
6. Humor is the best medicine. I honestly don't think I would survive if I couldn't make myself laugh through all of this. I make jokes at myself and generally about my uterus but I have survived and I am strong and I am getting through this. Laughter makes any day brighter.
7. I have never believed in myself as much as I have since I've gotten this diagnosis. Some days I feel invincible as if nothing could get me down. These are the days I long for. I believe that I am capable of everything and nothing can get me down.
8. I have so many people that love me.....not just me.....so many people that love Justin and I.....actually not even just us.....so many people that love myself and Justin and mcbaby. It's really overwhelming.
9. God is closer than I've ever imagined. In the big picture of everything happening around me, God has made himself so open to me, actually I've probably just made myself more open to Him, but it's such a neat feeling. I've had so many more happy joyous days than depressed days.
10. Everyday I feel like something big is going to happen. Even if our chosen day is a few years down the road, each new day is so exciting, because each new day is one day closer.
Words can't begin the express my gratitude to all of you who have prayed for Justin and I, especially during this last month. So many things are opening for us and bigger things are coming into play here in Lafayette. Our hearts are being transformed and it was a renewal of joy, hope and faith that I needed.
We love you all so much
justin&heather
