Every year of college at the end of December I would always write a reflection note....try to remember the moments of the year. I looked forward to this, it also helped update friends and family as I lived in the Chicago area for school and didn't always share life happenings regularly. The holidays are very quickly approaching and I know I will get caught up in everything......so today I write my reflection on 2013 - knowing that things could still happen in the next couple of weeks! Enjoy :)
The beginning of the year was full of birthday celebrations. In mid February I finally had my gallbladder removed after 8 long, painful and nauseous months of medicine, testing, doctors visits and ER trips. That is one body piece I will NEVER miss. I enjoyed my time off of work (ha) and hate that I can no longer eat red meat. The beginning of February was the first anniversary of my grandfather's passing. During this past year I have turned into an emotional person - I was never a heartless person (maybe towards some people) but I've always been the strong one - the supportive one - I couldn't break down because I had to hold it together for everyone else. I finally caved this year, my emotions don't get held in so much anymore.....it's not a bad thing, my grandfather was just such an inspirational person that losing him took a big piece of my heart....still kind of feels numb.
In March I started a new job at Aspire :). While my job can be stressful and some days quite frustrating (what job can't be though) I do have a pretty awesome group of co-workers who make the work days "easier" They have become like family....and most certainly became friends!
On the 3rd day of April I FINALLY convinced Justin to just elope :). I spent my lunch break at the court house in fron of Judge Newman and our mothers and committed my life to the best thing that could ever happen to me :). I'm sure I make people sick with all my posts about him but he really is great and if you knew my life that he walked into and turned his back on.....you would think so much more of him as well. Sweet Raegann also turned 1 this month and it has been a joyous second year with her.
May was rough as Justin lost his grandmother. A sweet lady that him and his sister and mom loved so much. I choose to believe her and my grandfather are watching us everyday. June 1st Justin and I celebrated our marriage with our closest friends and our family. The day started out with LOTS of rain (I believe our grandparents heavenly celebration for us) and ended with lots of sunshine. We had a great time lots of laughs were shared that day. Justin and I blessed for sure.
The summer was a lot of fun and really busy. I turned a quarter of a century old and Justin and I hit the gym like crazy becoming gym rats rather quickly. We enjoyed several concerts and bonfires in our hand built fire pit.
In a September just was hired by CSX as a conductor for,the railroads. We left mid September for our "honeymoon" in Gatlinburg. It was hands down the most relaxing and enjoyable week I think I've ever had. We were in no hurry to do anything there. We loved hiking, all the shops, the good southern food and of course our new friends Monroeville. We spent every night in the Ole Smokey Holler listening to live bluegrass music and making friend with the band and The Kickin Chicken (Roger Cook). It was so hard to come back....I could spend my life in Tennessee....that is for sure.
Two days after returning Justin left for Georgia for 6 weeks for CSX training to say I missed him is an understatement. It was rough - but he was so good at being strong for me. He excelled in the training - just like I knew he would. On September 30th I had to put our sweet Rocky boy to rest, this was by far the hardest thing I've ever had to do. I loved the fur boy so much. He was our gentle giant, our cuddling teddy bear. We will always miss him but know,he is healthy and cancer free now.
In October we adopted our adorable Millie Jo....Cricket has become quite fond of her and she is a great addition to our home.....although no one will ever replace Rocky. We love Millie so much and all the energy she brings. Justin came home on November 2nd and I've never been so excited to get up early on a Saturday before. I told myself when I saw him I would never let him go. My love for him grew so much while he was gone. I never realized just how much he did until he wasn't here
November was really hard trying to,adjust to his,different work weeks while he's been in training. We have learned to make the most,of,all our time together. We decided to,put our house up on the market. The driving back and forth to Lafayette is becoming inconvenient and costly. We are hoping to make the move up there somewhat soon.
This year has flown by. It has been so,exciting for Justin and I. So many changes have come and so many more will happen. I hope 2013 was a joyous time for all of you. I know rough moments come but I hope overall this year was a good one. I'm looking forward to the changes, the adventures, the rough spots, the laughter, the tears and all the memories to come in 2014. Even though it's a little early Justin and I wish all of you a very Merry Christmas and lots of love and blessings in the coming year.
Love,
The McMahans
Wednesday, December 11, 2013
Monday, November 25, 2013
A little game called catch up
It is a good thing I don't blog for a living because I am terrible at keeping up with it. While it would be easy to say my typical "life has been happening" excuse....I will save it for another blog. In all honesty I'm trying to adjust to my husband being back home and his new work schedule.
Let me try to catch you up.....
Justin returned home on November 2nd it was hands down...the 2nd best day of my life (1st being when we got married....duh). I told myself I would never let go of him again.....6 weeks was long, but we survived and our love grew....and so did his beard.....but NOT my waist line as I lost 10 pounds :). Wow what a runon sentence that was :). Anyways I have been lovin on my husband (not necessarily literally....this is a family friendly blog...geesh) and enjoying our time together. He worked 2nd shift for a couple weeks and that was rough but I knew he was coming home every night. He continues to enjoy the job and all the learning that comes with and I will never cross a railroad track like normal after all I've learned from him. Watch out I just might be the next CSX conductor - ha
Millie and Cricket are doing well. Cricket is still a pain in my hind end. Millie is gaining weight - YAY!!!! She took to Justin really well and loves him.....but not as much as her momma ;)
My job is still crazy busy....my caseload is always growing it seems and as long as it's busy then I know it will be stressful. Which has lead me to a new fashion in.....hives :/. Lucky me gets to see an allergist next week for allergy testing. Gross!!!
Justin's job is different than we thought it would be. He won't be on call like we thought and his trips to Chicago will be scarce. The positive part of that is no overnights without my husband and he has his weekends off :). The negative side is more driving to Lafayette than we had expected which has led us to.......
Put our house up for sale!!! We met with a realtor last Tuesday and by the next day there was a sign in our yard. So far one person has looked at it (haven't heard either about that one yet). This is a big deal for us as we love our house, our quiet road and our across the street neighbors. However we have been talking about a change for us and well it sounds like Lafayette is going to be it
I told you from the beginning exciting things would be happening for the McMahan's and they are. Now if I could find a job and we could sell the house.....new adventures will beging.
Wishing you all a very HAPPY THANKSGIVING!!!! We have so many things to be thankful for
With love
The McMahan's
Let me try to catch you up.....
Justin returned home on November 2nd it was hands down...the 2nd best day of my life (1st being when we got married....duh). I told myself I would never let go of him again.....6 weeks was long, but we survived and our love grew....and so did his beard.....but NOT my waist line as I lost 10 pounds :). Wow what a runon sentence that was :). Anyways I have been lovin on my husband (not necessarily literally....this is a family friendly blog...geesh) and enjoying our time together. He worked 2nd shift for a couple weeks and that was rough but I knew he was coming home every night. He continues to enjoy the job and all the learning that comes with and I will never cross a railroad track like normal after all I've learned from him. Watch out I just might be the next CSX conductor - ha
Millie and Cricket are doing well. Cricket is still a pain in my hind end. Millie is gaining weight - YAY!!!! She took to Justin really well and loves him.....but not as much as her momma ;)
My job is still crazy busy....my caseload is always growing it seems and as long as it's busy then I know it will be stressful. Which has lead me to a new fashion in.....hives :/. Lucky me gets to see an allergist next week for allergy testing. Gross!!!
Justin's job is different than we thought it would be. He won't be on call like we thought and his trips to Chicago will be scarce. The positive part of that is no overnights without my husband and he has his weekends off :). The negative side is more driving to Lafayette than we had expected which has led us to.......
Put our house up for sale!!! We met with a realtor last Tuesday and by the next day there was a sign in our yard. So far one person has looked at it (haven't heard either about that one yet). This is a big deal for us as we love our house, our quiet road and our across the street neighbors. However we have been talking about a change for us and well it sounds like Lafayette is going to be it
I told you from the beginning exciting things would be happening for the McMahan's and they are. Now if I could find a job and we could sell the house.....new adventures will beging.
Wishing you all a very HAPPY THANKSGIVING!!!! We have so many things to be thankful for
With love
The McMahan's
Sunday, October 13, 2013
No title
Im really bad at titles for this thing - oh well!!! I would promise to not fill these posts about Justin being away.....but let's face it that is my life right now. I thought things might get easier with each day.....they don't. I'm tired.....full out tired, I get frustrated on a daily basis, stupid little things agitate me and the only thing I can thing is "I'm so glad we don't have kids". I would feel so bad if I had children right now.
Work is crazy busy, it keeps me on my toes but it's busy.....almost irritating busy. However I signed up for this job and my co-workers rock so it makes it worth while.
We've hit the half way point until Justin comes home.....oh I can't wait. Tomorrow (10/14) he books his flight home....this will make things so much more realistic.
I'm realizing more and more each day just how much my husband really does around here :). I've been enjoying my time with my sister and her kids. Seeing the rest of my family all these different times - just keeping me busy.
This past Thursday we adopted a new dog. :). Cricket started acting out when we had to put Rocky down and justing thought maybe she was lonely so he suggested we look for another dog. I went to the Animal Protection League in Anderson and fell in love with Lilly.....now named Millie Jo. She is an almost 3 years old boxer mix. She is sweet and cuddly and fitting in well with our family. I can't wait for Justin to come home and meet here.
Keep watching for more from the McMahans
Work is crazy busy, it keeps me on my toes but it's busy.....almost irritating busy. However I signed up for this job and my co-workers rock so it makes it worth while.
We've hit the half way point until Justin comes home.....oh I can't wait. Tomorrow (10/14) he books his flight home....this will make things so much more realistic.
I'm realizing more and more each day just how much my husband really does around here :). I've been enjoying my time with my sister and her kids. Seeing the rest of my family all these different times - just keeping me busy.
This past Thursday we adopted a new dog. :). Cricket started acting out when we had to put Rocky down and justing thought maybe she was lonely so he suggested we look for another dog. I went to the Animal Protection League in Anderson and fell in love with Lilly.....now named Millie Jo. She is an almost 3 years old boxer mix. She is sweet and cuddly and fitting in well with our family. I can't wait for Justin to come home and meet here.
Keep watching for more from the McMahans
Wednesday, October 2, 2013
My sweet sweet Rocky boy
This post is hard to right - October 2012 Justin and heard about a dog that was going to be out down because his owner didn't want to take care of him anymore. I couldn't stand the thought of a dog being put down for now reason.....I convinced Justin to let us take the dog in at least until we could find a good home for him. It was almost 10:00pm and we drove to Frankton to meet......Rocky. When we met Rocky he was in terrible shape - his skin was a mess, he had fleas so bad that when we dumped water on him during his bath when he got him home blood just pours off of him from the flea bites. It was sad - he was in terrible shape but I couldn't bring myself to tell the lady we didn't want to take him. It didn't take long before Justin and I knew Rocky would not be finding another owner as we were his family and he was the perfect fit for us.
Rocky was our gentle giant, our giant teddy bear - if he could lay on your lap, all 109.5 lbs of him, all day long he was in his happy place. Rocky loved attention, he craved affection and he gave back so much love and joy. He loved everyone, especially kids. He was the first one to greet you at the door when you came home and he little nub would wag constantly. He gave the best kisses and was the best cuddler. He was a momma's boy (although he loved daddy too), he loved his tennis ball and stealing chewies from his sister. He had the loudest snore and it would shake the floor. Justin and I would just laugh at night.
On September 30, 2013 I made the hardest decision I've ever made and had Rocky laid to rest. You see Rocky has cancer, was apparently blind in his right eye and was becoming very slow and lethargic. He was losing use and movement of his back right leg, he was losing control of his ability to use the restroom and I could tell he was just sad. As much as I wanted to wait until Justin returned from Georgia I couldn't make him wait 5 more weeks as I was afraid I would come home and find him gone. My parents accompanied me to the vet and I stayed with Rocky until his last breath....and a few minutes after. I petted him the whole way through and kept reminding him how much Justin and I loved him. He went very peacefully, even though I sobbed and sobbed and cried louder than I've ever heard myself cry. You see I'm not sure who rescued whom it's easy to say Justin and I rescued him as we gave him the best last year of him life. He was loved by so many and he loved everyone. Sometimes I think Rocky saved us more because he showed us how to love, especially the ones who may not look the prettiest.
Rocky was the best dog and losing him I lost a small part of my heart. I know he is cancer free now, he's happy and he's healthy, but it doesn't kept me from missing him. Rest in peace Rocky, run wild and run free. Mommy and daddy will see you again one day. Love you Rocky boy.
Rocky was our gentle giant, our giant teddy bear - if he could lay on your lap, all 109.5 lbs of him, all day long he was in his happy place. Rocky loved attention, he craved affection and he gave back so much love and joy. He loved everyone, especially kids. He was the first one to greet you at the door when you came home and he little nub would wag constantly. He gave the best kisses and was the best cuddler. He was a momma's boy (although he loved daddy too), he loved his tennis ball and stealing chewies from his sister. He had the loudest snore and it would shake the floor. Justin and I would just laugh at night.
On September 30, 2013 I made the hardest decision I've ever made and had Rocky laid to rest. You see Rocky has cancer, was apparently blind in his right eye and was becoming very slow and lethargic. He was losing use and movement of his back right leg, he was losing control of his ability to use the restroom and I could tell he was just sad. As much as I wanted to wait until Justin returned from Georgia I couldn't make him wait 5 more weeks as I was afraid I would come home and find him gone. My parents accompanied me to the vet and I stayed with Rocky until his last breath....and a few minutes after. I petted him the whole way through and kept reminding him how much Justin and I loved him. He went very peacefully, even though I sobbed and sobbed and cried louder than I've ever heard myself cry. You see I'm not sure who rescued whom it's easy to say Justin and I rescued him as we gave him the best last year of him life. He was loved by so many and he loved everyone. Sometimes I think Rocky saved us more because he showed us how to love, especially the ones who may not look the prettiest.
Rocky was the best dog and losing him I lost a small part of my heart. I know he is cancer free now, he's happy and he's healthy, but it doesn't kept me from missing him. Rest in peace Rocky, run wild and run free. Mommy and daddy will see you again one day. Love you Rocky boy.
Sunday, September 29, 2013
.......
My sister informed me I haven't blogged in a while, it's true and I'm aware but here I am. I apologize how this post may go but with the way my emotions have been one would I was pregnant - which I am NOT so don't anyone get too excited reading that.
September 14-20 Justin and spent our "honeymoon" in Nashville and Gatlinburg Tennessee. What a wonderful trip we had. The weather was gorgeous, the food was scrumptious, the live bluegrass music we listened to every night was amazing and having the whole week just me and my husband was the greatest blessing. I could spend everyday with him. I love everything about him. We met some great people, made friends with a band, and hiked through some beautiful mountains and saw breathtaking waterfalls. We thoroughly enjoyed our time together.
The Sunday we returned from vacation, the 22nd I drove Justin (with my mom and nephew) to the Indianapolis airport and watched him board a plane to Georgia for 6 weeks. I have cried many times since he has been gone. I'm aware it's only 6 weeks, I'm aware I know he's coming home, I'm aware military wives have it worse than me (I appreciate them way more now that I somewhat understand) but this has been rough. We are one week down and 5 more to go and I miss my husband so much. He is my absolute best friend and I appreciate him so much, making a career change to better himself and in return better our family. He is a special man and doing big things for both of us.....and our future children.
So like I've said in every post life is exciting for the McMahans....and it's getting more exciting. I'm ready to have to husband home. To hug him tight, kiss him passionately and get back to live with him directly by my side. I am so grateful though that he is hardworking and future oriented.
In the mean time I'm getting lots of things done around the house :). I've started earlier work hours so I get more time at the gym and more time at home. Keep reading life changes are coming.
Love,
The McMahans
September 14-20 Justin and spent our "honeymoon" in Nashville and Gatlinburg Tennessee. What a wonderful trip we had. The weather was gorgeous, the food was scrumptious, the live bluegrass music we listened to every night was amazing and having the whole week just me and my husband was the greatest blessing. I could spend everyday with him. I love everything about him. We met some great people, made friends with a band, and hiked through some beautiful mountains and saw breathtaking waterfalls. We thoroughly enjoyed our time together.
The Sunday we returned from vacation, the 22nd I drove Justin (with my mom and nephew) to the Indianapolis airport and watched him board a plane to Georgia for 6 weeks. I have cried many times since he has been gone. I'm aware it's only 6 weeks, I'm aware I know he's coming home, I'm aware military wives have it worse than me (I appreciate them way more now that I somewhat understand) but this has been rough. We are one week down and 5 more to go and I miss my husband so much. He is my absolute best friend and I appreciate him so much, making a career change to better himself and in return better our family. He is a special man and doing big things for both of us.....and our future children.
So like I've said in every post life is exciting for the McMahans....and it's getting more exciting. I'm ready to have to husband home. To hug him tight, kiss him passionately and get back to live with him directly by my side. I am so grateful though that he is hardworking and future oriented.
In the mean time I'm getting lots of things done around the house :). I've started earlier work hours so I get more time at the gym and more time at home. Keep reading life changes are coming.
Love,
The McMahans
Sunday, September 8, 2013
Update:
Once again I apologize that it's been a while......my only explanation is life is happening....and life is happening fast!
Justin and I have to survive this week of work and then we are off on vacation for a week.....just me, him and the mountains :). Two of my favorite things - my studly husband and the breathtaking mountains. We are looking forward to just the two of us, hiking, running in the mountains, eating scrumptious southern food, and celebrating us - as this is our honeymoon (5.5 months later)
The sad part of vacation is the Monday we get back I will be driving Justin to the airport and sending him off for 6 weeks in Atlanta,GA for training for his new job. I am NOT doing well with this. I know military wives go without their husbands for much longer and I respect them so much - but I honestly haven't figured out how I am going to do this. My husband is my best friend and we do so much together. Thankfully we have amazing families and wonderful friends who have offered their time occupy me.
Labor Day weekend was a lot of fun Justin and I did so much around the house. We installed and successfully hooked up a dishwasher - we painted the mudroom a lovely color that I refer to as " low-fat chocolate milk" and we purchased beautiful wood vinyl flooring for the mud room. Looking forward to working with my uncle while Justin is gone to install the flooring.
I have many house projects planned for my husband-less weeks. Maybe I will be able to update more as right now I'm being very selfish with my time and its belonging to Justin right now. With the except of yesterday when I spent the day with my mom, sister, niece and nephew :)
Oh and we bought a 2014 Toyota corolla - it's a beautiful car!!!!
Much love
The McMahans
Justin and I have to survive this week of work and then we are off on vacation for a week.....just me, him and the mountains :). Two of my favorite things - my studly husband and the breathtaking mountains. We are looking forward to just the two of us, hiking, running in the mountains, eating scrumptious southern food, and celebrating us - as this is our honeymoon (5.5 months later)
The sad part of vacation is the Monday we get back I will be driving Justin to the airport and sending him off for 6 weeks in Atlanta,GA for training for his new job. I am NOT doing well with this. I know military wives go without their husbands for much longer and I respect them so much - but I honestly haven't figured out how I am going to do this. My husband is my best friend and we do so much together. Thankfully we have amazing families and wonderful friends who have offered their time occupy me.
Labor Day weekend was a lot of fun Justin and I did so much around the house. We installed and successfully hooked up a dishwasher - we painted the mudroom a lovely color that I refer to as " low-fat chocolate milk" and we purchased beautiful wood vinyl flooring for the mud room. Looking forward to working with my uncle while Justin is gone to install the flooring.
I have many house projects planned for my husband-less weeks. Maybe I will be able to update more as right now I'm being very selfish with my time and its belonging to Justin right now. With the except of yesterday when I spent the day with my mom, sister, niece and nephew :)
Oh and we bought a 2014 Toyota corolla - it's a beautiful car!!!!
Much love
The McMahans
Friday, August 30, 2013
Marriage
Let me start this by saying I'm sorry it's been a while since I've posted....I've started an online class and we adopted a puppy and well.....it's been busy
Secondly let me say...I LOVE being married.....I really do - best decision I've ever made....and I love it so much because I love who I chose to marry. I really am the lucky one. I'm sitting here on my day off playing on Pintefest and doing a lot nothing (best day off) and I'm pinning a lot of quotes and such related to marriage....because its awesome ;) - lol. Then I saw a pin that someone I follow pinned that said something along the lines of "why don't you text your husband how you feel instead of posting it on Facebook"
1. I do text my husband or call him to see how his day is going to tell him I love him....and he does the same
2. I post about my husband and our marriage on Facebook,because if I'm not going to brag about him or our marriage (yes we have our spats and irritating moments but we really work well together) than who is?
It's part of my job as a wife to make sure I build my husband up in confidence, love, support and prayer. It's might job to make sure he always knows I love him. I don't always post it on Facebook - but sometimes I do - because it's a joyous thing. I'm spending my .life with my best friend - people post things about their best friend all the time - mine is my spouse :)
I'm not sure if I should have really felt - I suppose it was hurt that I felt - about the pinned quote but I just couldn't get past it. I think my husband is awesome- because he really is. He does amazing things for me and our "family". He's always thinking of others and considering their feelings I guess if people don't like seeing me post about him then they can unfriend me....but I wonder how much better they would feel if they boasted about their spouse a little more.
Just my ramble and rant for the day! Looking forward to this 3 day weekend with my husband :). Vacation in 2 weeks!!!! YAHOO :)
The McMahans
Secondly let me say...I LOVE being married.....I really do - best decision I've ever made....and I love it so much because I love who I chose to marry. I really am the lucky one. I'm sitting here on my day off playing on Pintefest and doing a lot nothing (best day off) and I'm pinning a lot of quotes and such related to marriage....because its awesome ;) - lol. Then I saw a pin that someone I follow pinned that said something along the lines of "why don't you text your husband how you feel instead of posting it on Facebook"
1. I do text my husband or call him to see how his day is going to tell him I love him....and he does the same
2. I post about my husband and our marriage on Facebook,because if I'm not going to brag about him or our marriage (yes we have our spats and irritating moments but we really work well together) than who is?
It's part of my job as a wife to make sure I build my husband up in confidence, love, support and prayer. It's might job to make sure he always knows I love him. I don't always post it on Facebook - but sometimes I do - because it's a joyous thing. I'm spending my .life with my best friend - people post things about their best friend all the time - mine is my spouse :)
I'm not sure if I should have really felt - I suppose it was hurt that I felt - about the pinned quote but I just couldn't get past it. I think my husband is awesome- because he really is. He does amazing things for me and our "family". He's always thinking of others and considering their feelings I guess if people don't like seeing me post about him then they can unfriend me....but I wonder how much better they would feel if they boasted about their spouse a little more.
Just my ramble and rant for the day! Looking forward to this 3 day weekend with my husband :). Vacation in 2 weeks!!!! YAHOO :)
The McMahans
Thursday, August 22, 2013
Clean Eating
Justin and I have embarked on a clean eating journey. We did our first shopping trip a couple of nights to go and we are broke....not really,but we've never had a grocery bill that high. I suppose it's all worth it in the end. Today is starting day 2 yesterday wasn't too bad but it's only the beginning. I've started waking up at 5:00am to cook a breakfast and get our lunches ready. The only good part of getting up that early is it brings Justin and I to the breakfast table together - that is a refreshing start to the day :)
Keep looking for more updates on our adventures and our clean eating eating journey
The McMahan's
Keep looking for more updates on our adventures and our clean eating eating journey
The McMahan's
Sunday, August 18, 2013
True Love is Appreciative
In church today Pastor mentioned that true love is appreciative....what a great word to explain love. I've touched on this before and have probably said it a million times but my main goal in my marriage is for Justin to never doubt that I love him.....my second goal.....that Justin might get a small glimpse into how much I appreciate him. I will never fully be able to express my appreciation for him....it's too abundant.
I remember at my wedding shower my mother in law bawling and then hugging me as I cried thanking her for raising such a wonderful man......all by herself. You see I came from a very hurtful and broken past......some very happy moments and some of the darkest moments I never thought I would ever imagine. I was so bruised and scarred and torn, I had no self esteem and I was a mess.....a broken mess. Justin didn't care.....ok I'm not sure how to phrase that correctly because he cared......but he didn't judge me by my past....the things I went through. He loved me (and still does) because I survived....because even though I was worn and at complete rock bottom....I pushed on another day.....maybe a small part of me knew it would end with him.
He has become my rock, my safe place and my happiness. He has boost my self esteem, he has believed in me so much that I believe in myself again. He makes me laugh and allows me to cry when I need to. One of my co-workers said to me the other day "I'm just gonna throw this out there but I really think you love your husband." I love it because I want everyone to know how much I love my husband.
Tracy Byrd says it perfectly in 'Keeper of the Stars' when he says "there really are no words to show my gratitude". So true there are no words but I am so thankful to God for Justin.
I remember at my wedding shower my mother in law bawling and then hugging me as I cried thanking her for raising such a wonderful man......all by herself. You see I came from a very hurtful and broken past......some very happy moments and some of the darkest moments I never thought I would ever imagine. I was so bruised and scarred and torn, I had no self esteem and I was a mess.....a broken mess. Justin didn't care.....ok I'm not sure how to phrase that correctly because he cared......but he didn't judge me by my past....the things I went through. He loved me (and still does) because I survived....because even though I was worn and at complete rock bottom....I pushed on another day.....maybe a small part of me knew it would end with him.
He has become my rock, my safe place and my happiness. He has boost my self esteem, he has believed in me so much that I believe in myself again. He makes me laugh and allows me to cry when I need to. One of my co-workers said to me the other day "I'm just gonna throw this out there but I really think you love your husband." I love it because I want everyone to know how much I love my husband.
Tracy Byrd says it perfectly in 'Keeper of the Stars' when he says "there really are no words to show my gratitude". So true there are no words but I am so thankful to God for Justin.
Thursday, August 15, 2013
Sometimes I make myself laugh
If you know me well.....none of this will come as a surprise......if you don't know me well and you haven't realized this from the first two posts.......I stress myself out....A LOT. I work myself up so bad it makes me sick.....I can't sleep, all I want is to eat chocolate, anxiety kicks into overdrive. I do all of this without fully thinking through every situation.....I'm a girl that's my excuse.
BUT.....here is the good news....JUSTIN AND I ARE NOT MOVING!!!!!! Woooo feels good to say that. So much stress and weight was on my shoulders thinking about finding a place to move, moving, either driving an hour back and forth to work, paying extra gas, trying to meet new people.....my anxiety medicine doesn't cover all of that.
After much discussion Justin and I decided that will all things considered it would be much easier and make more sense for us to stay at our house in Alex. I am so excited.....I was not selfish.....I promise. I was coming to terms with leaving Aspire and actually even applied for a job in Lafayette......but my husband is so sweet and logically talked everything through with me. He is trading in his truck for a fuel efficient car and when he has to be on a train will make the drive.
We make a good team....we really do....we are both willing to make sacrifices and compromise.....but in the end we make it work for the best. Looking back on these last few days I am laughing because I was a nut case.....seriously. My emotions were everywhere and I was so worked up.....for NOTHING
Like I said life is exciting for us McMahan's and now I get to blog about all the exciting remodels and updates we will be doing to our house :)
BUT.....here is the good news....JUSTIN AND I ARE NOT MOVING!!!!!! Woooo feels good to say that. So much stress and weight was on my shoulders thinking about finding a place to move, moving, either driving an hour back and forth to work, paying extra gas, trying to meet new people.....my anxiety medicine doesn't cover all of that.
After much discussion Justin and I decided that will all things considered it would be much easier and make more sense for us to stay at our house in Alex. I am so excited.....I was not selfish.....I promise. I was coming to terms with leaving Aspire and actually even applied for a job in Lafayette......but my husband is so sweet and logically talked everything through with me. He is trading in his truck for a fuel efficient car and when he has to be on a train will make the drive.
We make a good team....we really do....we are both willing to make sacrifices and compromise.....but in the end we make it work for the best. Looking back on these last few days I am laughing because I was a nut case.....seriously. My emotions were everywhere and I was so worked up.....for NOTHING
Like I said life is exciting for us McMahan's and now I get to blog about all the exciting remodels and updates we will be doing to our house :)
Tuesday, August 13, 2013
Change
I'm going to be honest.......I HATE change.....despise it....makes me gag......throws me into a panic attack.....absolutely hate change. When I get into schedule or a "groove" I want it to stay that way - not doing anything different. But apparently life doesn't work the way I want it to. As lots and lots of changes are occurring and will continue to occur for the next few months.
I get scared for change - afraid I will fail - afraid it won't end good - and even afraid it will be even better than I could imagine (weird that that can be scary) I'm not ready for change. I'm not ready to start over.
A friend of mine posted this picture on Facebook and well.....I guess it's what I needed to read today
I get scared for change - afraid I will fail - afraid it won't end good - and even afraid it will be even better than I could imagine (weird that that can be scary) I'm not ready for change. I'm not ready to start over.
A friend of mine posted this picture on Facebook and well.....I guess it's what I needed to read today
My feelings are so jumbled.....like I said like is getting so exciting......but life is also getting scary - ha :)
Stay tuned.....more of my stress....more of my confusion.....more of my anxiety......more of our changes......and more of the exciting adventures for us :)
Monday, August 12, 2013
Greetings
Greetings - my first post on this new blog! So many of my Facebook friends have family,blogs and they are so fun to read I decided I would keep ........or at least attempt to keep one of my own. It seems like so much is always going on for Justin and I and honestly, I don't care how exciting the news is I sometimes get tired of repeating stores. This might make that easier :)
Our current state......or might current state is stressed and overwhelmed.......to the point I now have meds for stress/anxiety induced headaches......lovely I know :). I'm transitioning into a new role at work....which made my caseload jump and my daily schedule get even bigger. But my clients (most of them) are worth it :). I enjoy what I do and days like today I'm thankful for a gym membership with nice treadmills!
Justin's life is exciting right now. He is the testing process for a new job :). He's had the offer handed and he has accepted now the fun testing so he can get an official start date. We prayed hard for a new opportunity and a door has opened. A part of me is still nervous something won't pan out....but right now it's all good :). And with this job retirement looks like a definite possibility - 25 and I'm already ready for retirement!! Unfortunately with this job it looks as though we may be moving a little closer to Lafayette (he job) and a little further from Anderson (my job) - adding more stress to my day as financially I'm going crazy trying to play around with our budget to find something we can afford.
Thankfully John 16:33 reminds me "In this world you will have trouble. But take heart for,I have overcome the world". There will be light at the end of what seems like this very long tunnel
Life is getting exciting for us McMahans :)
Our current state......or might current state is stressed and overwhelmed.......to the point I now have meds for stress/anxiety induced headaches......lovely I know :). I'm transitioning into a new role at work....which made my caseload jump and my daily schedule get even bigger. But my clients (most of them) are worth it :). I enjoy what I do and days like today I'm thankful for a gym membership with nice treadmills!
Justin's life is exciting right now. He is the testing process for a new job :). He's had the offer handed and he has accepted now the fun testing so he can get an official start date. We prayed hard for a new opportunity and a door has opened. A part of me is still nervous something won't pan out....but right now it's all good :). And with this job retirement looks like a definite possibility - 25 and I'm already ready for retirement!! Unfortunately with this job it looks as though we may be moving a little closer to Lafayette (he job) and a little further from Anderson (my job) - adding more stress to my day as financially I'm going crazy trying to play around with our budget to find something we can afford.
Thankfully John 16:33 reminds me "In this world you will have trouble. But take heart for,I have overcome the world". There will be light at the end of what seems like this very long tunnel
Life is getting exciting for us McMahans :)
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