Bitter!!

I know, I know, I know.....being bitter is not good for the heart or good for the should or the right way to be. But anyone reading this would be lying to themselves if they said they've never been bitter about something or towards someone. I'm gonna be honest when I say I get a little bitter with every pregnancy post on Facebook, every person I run into whose child I went to school with is expecting, blah, blah, blah. I know, this makes me sound like a terrible terrible person. I promise I'm not.....I'm just honest. What kind of woman struggling with fertility wouldn't be bitter or frustrated every time someone new announces they are expecting a sweet little bundle of joy that your body refuses to make?  Does it mean I'm not happy for this people?  Of course not, I am very happy and excited for them. After the initial announcement I love seeing all their updates, I love their excitement as their belly grows, the pick our nursery furniture and they decided on names. I would NEVER want anyone to struggle with fertility, to feel the things I feel. 

I'm working on it I promise!  I honestly mean it when I say I'm working on it. But you're hit with these new realities of mine and all of sudden EVERY woman in the world (except me obviously) is pregnant it stabs you in the heart just a little. Sounds a little extreme but that's how it feels. 

Ok I'm done ranting about that. Thank tou to everyone for your kind words, you texts, your messages, your Facebook comments in so much support, love and prayers for Justin and I. We appreciate them so much. A few of my blood levels are off, but I see the doctor on the 20th to discuss all the results and our next step. 

We love you all!
Justin + Heather